If Ever I....

Brandon has a lot of odd sayings - mostly gotten from reading his "Thomas the Tank Engine" books. He will say things like "presently Caitlin came in my room", or "get on you". Once he even said "oh, bugger!" You'd think I was raising a little British boy! His latest odd saying: "If ever I..." as in, "if ever I should not see you I will just call your name", or "if ever my sandal comes off, I will just bend down and put it back on." Is this my kid? Do I talk like that? Are we watching too many British programs? I just don't know. He only does this for me. I'm not British!