This Time Last Year

What were we doing this time last year? At almost exactly this time, pacific time, an extremely huge moving truck was rolling into our street to pack up and haul away the contents of our house. Everything, that is, except the stuff we needed for the next week (while all our worldly possessions were in transit), and one lamp, which the movers thought we wanted to keep out. Where they got that idea I'll never know.

I don't remember a lot from that day. My dear friend and neighbor Chris had the kids for most of the day, and another friend Wendy joined in to help her out in the morning. It was hot, and I was exhausted from packing until 2:00 in the morning and getting up before 7:00. Around midnight we noticed we were running out of boxes, so I started driving around to local business and looking in their cardboard recycle bins. You'd be surprised what you can find out there! I think Brian was surprised when I returned home with so many boxes!

My job on May 7th, 2007 was to get some cash to tip the movers, and get lunch. I remember reaching into my wallet to grab my ATM card. As I grabbed it out and held it, all the contents of my wallet fell out and were strewn about on my lap and the floor of the car. It had given up. After 15 plus years of ownership, my wallet just broke. Every nook and cranny, except for the change purse, fell apart onto my lap. I can't say I blame the poor thing. And I knew exactly how it felt. There was a part of me that was barely holding on by a single thread, threatening at any moment to completely fall apart.

But I couldn't.

We had finally made a life decision on where to put down roots, after years of researching and travel, and this was really it. We were going. And I was holding on by a thread. The bay area was proving to be unaffordable, and we deeply needed changes in other areas of our life as well. Brian and I had discussed how we wanted to raise our children, and me working, at least during their younger years, was not part of that picture. However, if we were ever going to put down roots where we were, that picture needed to change. Our financial options were and are based solely on what we make, without outside help. And I am firm believer that it is unbiblical to put oneself into financial jeopardy on purpose, which is what would have happened to us had we decided to buy a house in the last few years. So change came in the form of moving.

How has it been? Not easy.

There are many thing I miss about my former life. Mostly friends and family. The easy drive to my in-laws house, or even to my parent's house. I am surprised that what I miss isn't a big list, but it affects me every day. I'm also surprised about the vast amount of stuff I don't miss at all. Truthfully, I thought I would miss a lot more. Several people assumed we moved so we could have a slower pace of life. Nothing could be farther from the truth. In fact, our lives have increased in business since moving. I cherish my days at home with no plans (at least until the kids start whining). We have a nice house, yes, but we didn't move just so we could buy a house. I would have been happier with much less if we had been able to purchase a house in the bay area. But situations happened that were completely out of our hands. And, for one reason or another, God lead us here.

It's not easy to start over, and we have had our ups and downs. Although we really like the pastor and worship leader at our current church, we are struggling to make any real connections within the congregation. Classes, Bible Study and MOPS haven't really helped. I have made a few friends, and the kids have a few friends. One family is moving 50 miles south in the next few weeks, which will make me and the kids sad. Caitlin likes to call the kids, and their mom, on her toy phone! Another friend is moving back to Pennsylvania over the summer. No one can blame them for wanting to be closer to family. Another friend is going to continue to live here! At least we might be able to get together over the sumer. I have been asked to join the steering team at my Thursday MOPS group, which I'd be happy to do if Brandon gets into afternoon kindergarten. I don't want to commit until I know if I can even attend. Even if I can do it, it would only be for a year.

It's been a crazy year. I'm very happy that I will not be up cleaning half the night tonight so that my landlord can come by and inspect our house. I will not be calling up other friends (Lisa!) who are moving to let them know we have extra boxes. In fact, I gave away the last of our boxes and a bunch of packing material to some friends just last week. Tomorrow I will not get into my car and begin a three day, four state trek with small children. And, on top of it all, it's not 95 degrees like it was this time last year in California. In fact, it's been raining all morning today.

Who knows what life will be like in the next year. Hopefully it will not involve any packing and moving (unless someone else is doing it for me!).